I… Feel Better Already?*

29 12 2009

This will make your cough go away, I promise. Take five lemons, one green apple, three red onions cut in quarters (NOT chopped), one cup of sugar, a lot of cinnamon, and some ginger ale, then cook and reduce into a thick liquid. It’s very important to always use odd numbers: one apple, three onions, five lemons. Never two, never four. Drink the whole thing between now and when you go to sleep tonight, and then don’t drink anything cold tomorrow. Only tea, only hot water. Cold will aggravate the cough. It will work, I guarantee it. My mother in El Salvador used to make this for me. Really, it works.
*Actual reenactment of something that happened to me today…

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2 responses

30 12 2009
Anne

The penguin looks skeptical.

30 12 2009
thehlesswonder

He is. I was too, but I drank the whole thing. It didn’t make me barf, but it didn’t totally work, either.

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